Balancing ADHD Life
Balance is often viewed by ADHDers as unattainable as capturing a moon beam. Their relations with others and activities are often like monkeys swinging through vines in the jungle. You can usually find them at one of two extremes on the pendulum: all systems fire, or no contact whatsoever. If they do experience a middle path, they’re probably too full of momentum toward the other extreme to even notice it, much less stop and stay a while. What if there was a way to bypass the exhaustion of all systems fire and the unintentional neglect or stall of not at all in a way that’s tailored to your unique ADHD self? If so, how is it done?
5 Steps toward intentional ADHD balance
What’s happening now? Log how you currently spend your time by writing or voice recording the name of the activity, what time it started and stopped, and the level of difficulty from one (minimal effort) to ten (extremely difficult). You may want to continue logging for a week or two or over the course of a whole month to cover a whole hormone cycle. At the end of the allotted time period, divide the activities into categories of working, resting including down time, time with friends and family, time spent on spiritual renewal;ie reflection, anything that brings meaning to your life, recreation, obligations, and self-maintenance, which includes grooming, dressing, and health care. Notice patterns of time and effort spent according to these categories.
How do you want it to be? Consider how much and what types of activities would be ideal for your optimal functioning? Such as, “how much and what kind of activity would feed my unique self the best so that my unique purpose and values are adequately addressed?” For example, “How long can I work at what type of activity effectively without taking a break?”, and “How much income per week would allow me the ideal recreation, family, spiritual, and down time for optimal performance of my purpose and gifts?
Plan it: Once you have your ideal amount of time, activity, and difficulty level in each category, what changes would need to happen from the current picture toward your ideal one? Feel free to start small here with one baby step, returning each week to evaluate your progress and continue adding on as necessary.
Practice: Once the changes are charted out, spend a week practicing the changes, one small step at a time. When blunders happen, because that is part of the process, allow yourself grace and return to curiosity about what might need to shift next time for increased progress. Return to the big picture each week at the same time to monitor progress and decide if you’re ready for the next step or if you want to keep practicing the same step for more stable footing.
Celebrate wins: Create a ritual either at the end of each day or the end of each week of noting your successes and resulting positive shifts, no matter how small they are. Enjoy the peace of mind from knowing you’re intentionally on your way to your own brand of balance.
To wrap up, balancing our relationship with one thing, much less between different areas of our lives, can be daunting for us ADHDers. However, the above tips have hopefully supplied a workable formula for noticing your current and ideal patterns among life’s various nooks and crannies as well as for charting an attainable course between the two in a way that works best for you.